Internal Family Systems

What is Internal Family Systems?

One of my teachers says, “You make something sacred by treating it in a sacred way.” IFS is a therapeutic model that helps us learn to treat all of our inner parts as sacred, to recognize the inborn capacity in each of us to facilitate our own healing from the seat of the Self.

IFS helps us recognize our inner multiplicity, not as a problem or burden, but rather as the natural and healthy way that our systems are organized. Some of our parts align with our deepest desires and help us accomplish our goals while others can unintentionally create pain and suffering as they respond to the outside world from an outdated understanding of who we are. Regardless of the impact of these parts, the practice is to treat them as sacred, as an indispensable part of our inner family.

Sometimes the idea of “parts” can be hard to grasp, especially in a world that pathologize multiplicity. But, if we take a look at everyday life, you may discover that you’re actually already operating with and around your parts constantly.

For example, have you ever felt really excited about a new relationship or job opportunity, while another part inside wants to stay safe and close to what is familiar?

What about those parts that want to enjoy community gatherings? And then the parts that are afraid and anxious about them?

How about when you hear a trusted friend or lover tell you how much they love and appreciate you only to later doubt and question if they really do?

Now that we see our parts, what do we do about it?

IFS is a map we use to explore our inner landscape and find our way to more aliveness. Instead of anything being done to you, instead of the healer or external force coming in and fixing you, IFS helps you get into healthy relationship with all of your parts. This is done by supporting you in establishing your experience of your Self - the Self being the healthy and loving adult, the one at the center who rests in wisdom, the seat of consciousness within you.

As we practice this evidence-based model of psychotherapy and learn to support our parts from Self, they begin releasing old burdens and outdated understandings. As this unburdening process continues we begin to relate to our inner and outer experience with more understanding, confidence, compassion, and trust. With the conscious arrival of the healthy and loving adult (the Self), the upset and scared children (parts) can finally relax and put down the burdens that they were never meant to carry, that they only picked up to survive.

Imagine how good and relieving that feels for everyone involved.

Imagine how much freed up energy and resource you then have to use for designing and enjoying the life you’re here to live.

Imagine what you’ll be able to create and how much pleasure you’ll be able to receive.

Curious to learn more about IFS?

Check out the IFS Institute or watch this short video of Richard Schwartz talking about the model.

There are also two great podcasts that will help you further explore IFS: The One Inside & IFS Talks

In addition to being a trained IFS practitioner, I am also Hakomi Level 1 trained, have a bachelor’s and master’s in classical music and am an initiate in multiple spiritual lineages. To learn more about my spiritual trainings and life journey check out my about me page.

Please note, I am not a licensed therapist or social worker. Please reach out with any questions you might have about how this may impact our work together.