Men’s Groups

Some Words on “Man”

The world is challenging us to expand beyond the old, stale, and inherited definitions of things.  Many communities have been fighting for this update to human consciousness for a long time.  We are finding ourselves at an inflection point; an opportunity to actually create a more inclusive, safe and courageous culture within which our families and communities can thrive in full self-expression.  One way we can move toward this reality is by studying ourselves and learning to love the multiplicity within, by no longer disbelonging parts of ourselves that have not fit tidily into the culture’s narrow and prescribed roles for us.

These men’s groups are a space for all people who self-identify as men.  This doesn’t necessarily mean that you only identify as a man.  One of my mentors in this work presents as a big, strong, hairy man. He also wears skirts to dance and sometimes goes by they/them pronouns. When he/they go to men’s group, he is explicit that he is there to work on his ‘manness’ without disregarding or abandoning his multiplicity.

And for those of you who feel uncomfortable or resistant when imagining yourself in a room with a man like my mentor who I described above - you are welcome too. Your judgement is invited into the room, not so that it can shame or attack another, but so that you may get to know it and allow the group field to support you in learning to express your authentic self respectfully and courageously.

These groups are designed to support participants in studying and growing in relationship to the parts of us that do identify with “man” or masculinity without disowning or shaming our other parts.  In other words, we are coming together to study and find freedom from our internalized male socialization insofar as it blocks us from authentic expression and relationship with Self, other, the natural world, and Spirit.

This process of socialization not only causes great harm upon our femme-identified and systemically marginalized relatives, but also upon ourselves and the planet.  It attempts to block us off from the reality of love that we are surrounded by.  This societal program wants - in fact - it needs us to feel isolated and confused in order for it to continue to thrive within us, unchallenged. 

So let’s do this - learn from each other, support and encourage one another, and finally, put down the torturous habit of needing to know and “be right” all the damn time.